Sunday, December 05, 2004

Trying to maintain perspective

I'm really friggin' depressed that I have my Masters in Arts but I'm still working in retail. I really thought I'd have a better job by now. I keep trying to make others in my position feel better about their similar circumstances, but it's hard to tell them to keep their chins up when all I want to do is cry. I feel like such a pathetic loser. I know it's only short-term, I know it does not reflect on my self-worth, but it's hard not to feel stupid telling people that I just graduated with my MA in Literature and now I'm working in retail and I don't really have any future plans, but that I am looking for a better job, I'm just not sure doing what. WTF??? I thought I'd have a job by now. Instead, I'm still working for not much money doing a job that is only fine when it's part-time, and I am stressed out and tired all the time...and then coming home is not much of a treat for me because I have too much to do here, or I have to look for work, or my roommate is here and I feel uncomfortable in my own home. I can't wait to go home and pretend I'm on vacation, although I know the questions of "So what are you doing in Ottawa?" are going to start very soon. Right now I sort of hate my life.

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